Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Denial ain't just a river.


This is my Prime Minister:
"I believe we have much to be pleased of from the work that we have done here," Harper said. "We have delivered a substantive statement on climate change, consistent with those of a number of other international organizations and one which builds momentum towards next month's important United Nations conference" in Bali.
I'm so proud of him!

That's the sound of sarcasm. Or it would be, if you could hear it. I dunno. Maybe you hear all of this in your head, and it sounds like Stuart McLean or something. I hope so. I mean, if you hear it in your head that I have timing like Stuart McLean. I do in my own head.

I also like the illiteration in the first sentence (Am I the first person to use that "word" and mean it? I might be.). I've never been "pleased of" anything. I can't imagine being pleased of anything. What would that entail, exactly? Is it much like being pleased from something? Steve, prepositions aren't that tricky. Learn to speak at least one official language like a university graduate.

Okay, now that I've belittled his grammar, let's get to the meat of it. He's proud of eighty-sixing any action on climate change. And he said it out loud. That shit might fly in Alberta, Steve, but Alberta has less than 10% of the representation in Parliament. The rest of us are fond of things like rainfall and fresh water.

Granted, the Libs signed Kyoto and then did shit. They don't get to rag on you too much for inaction. You, however, haven't been a fan of Kyoto, ever. No secret. You think it's a big conspiracy to hurt those poor, suffering oil companies, the ones who have to keep coming to the government for wage subsidies and tax rebates because they're not making enough money. The same ones who needed government funding to figure out how to make the tar sands an economically viable source of petroleum, when the answer was simply to wait until the price of oil got high enough to make it worthwhile.

Sometimes I feel so bad for those guys. They could be trillionaires! But they'll have to settle for being billionaires. The death of a dream, folks. That's what Kyoto is. The death of a dream.

You don't believe that climate change is happening. Fine, I guess. You're entitled to that. You don't believe that human activity has anything to do with it, even if it is happening. Fine, I guess. And you don't believe that we can do anything about it even if it is happening, and it's our fault. You have the right to believe that.

However, you do not have the right to bet my daughter's (and my neices' and your kids', and all the other children's) future(s) against your faith.

I'm also worried that you're an evangelical Xtian, so you actually want the end of the world to come about. Some day, I'm going to have words with John the Divine about the shit that's supposed to happen when Jesus comes back. Asshole managed to predict climate change (but the laundry list of bad shit that comes with climate change reads like the Old Testament).

So, climate change is not happening, if it is, it's not our fault, and if it's our fault we can't fix it without destroying the economy, and if we could, we shouldn't anyway, because we want Jesus.

Somebody kill this motherfucker.

So you've managed to single-handedly strip any initiative from an agreement that the Commonwealth nations were going to put together, requiring real action with real targets on climate change. I'm not particularly surprised that you're proud of yourself. However, I am surprised that you have the chutzpah to say that in public. To call this "substantive", however, shows an even greater failing of language than your flubbed preposition. Substantive, if I'm not mistaken, means "with substance". "[U]rg[ing] all nations to work toward undefined goals of reducing such emissions" is not particularly substantive.

It's like saying, "You know, if you want to, maybe you could reduce GHG emissions. If you want."

Steve. Fuck off. I can't say it any more clearly than that. Do something about Canada's GHG emissions. Or don't. But if you don't don't say you are. Genocide is bad enough. Lying about is somehow worse.

This is the big thing. He was supposedly elected to form a transparent government. Then he shut everyone out. He appointed a new ethics commissioner, and then fired him when he started looking into Conservative campaign contributions and the defection of a Liberal. I figured that was going to be the order of the day for Canada's new government (they're still calling themselves that, too, which is annoying).

But now he's lying (some more, I guess) about climate change.

Steve, don't punch me in the balls and tell me you're sucking my dick. I know better.

I can see through you. I hope the rest of Canada can.

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